The Start

The Start

With my purchase of a 2007 Audi A8, I have finally stepped up to a proper luxury car.  At least, in my own mind I have.  I did own a BMW 7-series once.  It doesn’t really count though, because by the time I owned it, it was almost old enough to get its own license to drive.  I had a GMC Yukon Denali XL, but it had a six digit odometer reading that started with a “2.”  I still have my (wildly high mileage) Lexus, but the LX series is essentially an off-roader which has been tarted up to look nicer.  It’s a very bouncy vehicle which is happiest on dirt or super bumpy terrain at low speeds.

My Audi, however, has only five digits on the odometer.  Of course, that first one is a “9" but we’ll just kind of ignore that.  It is a proper luxury vehicle that is comfortable to drive, has a powerful engine, and handles very well.

It’s still very new to me, and it is such a step up in luxury that I am having a difficult time handling it all.  At first I wasn’t too hot on the color of the car, but it is quickly growing on me.  I think it looks really good now.  But, every time I open the garage door and see it in there, I feel like I’m in the “Transporter” film franchise.  I’m just waiting for the most inept gang to come up on me and try to steal it.  Of course, they will have the courtesy to let me take off my suit jacket, and then send each member at me individually so that I can beat them up while they look on at my amazing fighting ability.

There are some things that ruin this.  First of all, I still have the paper dealer tags, not a European number plate.  Second, it’s a detached garage in a housing development, not an underground parking structure in some glamourous European city.  Third, I don’t know that there are actually any gangs of street toughs that roam said housing developments.  Regardless, I will admit that more than once I have felt compelled to drive to the airport to pick someone important up.  I also never feel as though I am dressed up enough to be driving it.

The following comment will undoubtably offend some people, and for that, I am very sorry.  Here goes... I have never met anyone who is both really successful and drives a Chrysler product.  I have close friends/family who drive these vehicles, and I wish they would reexamine certain Chrysler-related life choices.  There are vehicles out there that aren’t built by pot smoking drunks who spend their work days getting drunk and high.  There have been multiple instances of Chrysler employees getting busted for these things in the news.  I have seen many people who buy these vehicles at what have to be absolutely staggering monthly payments... for a car which will go out of style but have the singular advantage of having a wide base of replacement parts for when things go wrong.  I know that I am talking a tremendous amount of crap while owning an Audi, but facts are facts.  The cars do not give one the feeling of doing things really, really right.
 
On the other hand, when I drive my A8, I feel as though I need to step up my game and be more successful because the surroundings I am in while driving demand a certain level of responsibility and dignity.  The A8 shares its platform with much of the Bentley brand of cars, so VW were quite serious about getting things right.  For full disclosure, the nicest VW also uses the same chassis.  The point is, that the car is built to a standard that brings you up, not down.

On the subject of dignity, or should I say, “dignity” I have come up with a list of places and activities that I now feel awkward attempting to do with this car, because I would feel so out of place doing it.

1.) Picking up a pizza.
2.) Going to Taco Bell.
3.) Going to Dollar General.
4.) Getting groceries at Aldis.
5.) Parking anywhere near a Penguin Point.
6.) Going anywhere near anything that has to do with farming or Western apparel.

Honestly, I can’t imagine the “snooty factor” one would be at owning one of these things new.  I can tell you that the depreciation on these cars is straight down to the point that I can afford owning this car while it is still fully functioning.  At whatever point in it’s decline that you purchase it, it will depreciate faster than any new car at a similar price.  From an accounting standpoint, with my new low mileage life, the yearly depreciation per mile for me is going to be diabolical.

To loosen up a bit, though, I did drive it in reverse all the way to work one morning using the rear view camera.  It’s the only way I can drive it without breaking the speed limit on that stretch of road.

This is the first of what I hope will be at least a few blogs talking about my life adjusting to a luxury car.  Hopefully you found this interesting and funny.